balletrat | (no subject)

(no subject)

So Cooper says that every man has a secret longing to be Humphrey Bogart, *Meg announces, flopping backwards onto the bed as Andrew heads over to the DVD player.*

Is it true?

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*Except, of course, he's not calling the airport. He's calling the police department.*

*It's all coming together now, events rolling downhill to the inevitable, as the various players race for the airport.*

*And then they're at the airport, and Renault is filling out the names on the papers - Mr. and Mrs. Victor Laszlo.

Renault stares. Meg stares. Ilsa stares, and asks,* But why my name, Richard?

*And Rick says,* Because you're getting on that plane.

*And here it is. The classic scene in the classic movie, quoted and mocked and parodied a hundred times and it never loses its original meaning.*

*Andrew's whispering the words along with Rick.*

If that plane leaves the ground and you're not with him, you'll regret it. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon, and for the rest of your life....

*I said I would never leave you! Ilsa insists.*

And you never will. Where I'm going, you can't follow. What I've got to do, you can't be any part of. Ilsa, I'm no good at being noble, but it doesn't take much to see that the problems of two little people don't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world. Someday you'll understand that. Not now.

*His eyes are suspiciously bright. They always are, at this part.*

Here's looking at you, kid.

The problems of two little people don't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world.

*Well, Meg thinks - almost detached. Almost.

They got it.

How about that.

*Ilsa and Laszlo head towards the plane, Major Strasser shows up --*

*You knew this would happen. That last bit may have been a surprise if you've never heard the story before, but this? Come on. You knew this would happen.*

*Renault: Major Strasser's been shot! A pause. Round up the usual suspects!*

*And off charge the gendarmes, leaving Renault and Rick Blaine to finish the scene....*

*And it seems that when romance fails, manly bonding will see you through every time.*

Louis, *says Rick,* I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

*The two men walk off together into the night; and, just in case you missed it, the screen informs the careful viewer that they have reached THE END.*

*The credits roll.*

*Andrew turns to Meg, hopefully.*

Well?

*A short pause.

Then:* Laszlo, *Meg says, firmly, turning to him, and gives him a sideways grin.*

Rick's nice enough, but give me Laszlo any day.

Yeah?

*He turns away from the screen and settles a little more comfortably on the bed, folding his legs under him.*

How come?

Well, *Meg says, after a moment of thought,* who would you rather count on - the one who surprises you by occasionally doing the right thing, or the one who you always knew was going to do the right thing?

*This is a legitimate reason.

Meg is not going to mention that the real reason was the singing of the Marseilleise.*

... Probably the latter. I dunno if I'd count on Rick Blaine.

But I like him.

- that doesn't answer my question, though, *Meg says, with a sudden sly look.*

About whether you want to be him or not.

...No, you asked if I wanted to be Humphrey Bogart.

Different question.

*Reasonably:* Well, before I saw the movie I didn't know the difference.

Maybe you still don't. I should show you some more Humphrey Bogart.

- so is this what they call 'avoiding the question'? Just to be clear.

...maybe.

*Andrew points across the room.*

Hey, look, a blue bunny!

*Meg giggles.*

- I think we've already been over how much more of a distraction you need in Milliways than an oddly colored bunny.

You're right.

*He points again.*

Look, a blue bunny that's on FIRE! And ... singing!

*Serenely:* Singing demons are your job.

I can't think of any emergencies for your job, though.

-- Look, a giant thermos full of Satanic coffee!

. . . that one, *Meg allows,* might do the trick.

*He grins.*

So ... I was thinking if we're doing classic movies, the next one I should show you is Jaws.

*Meg blinks at him, and puts a rather puzzled hand up to her chin.*

- a film about mouths?

*snerk*

Not exactly. It's about a great white shark....

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